Bonus Points

n.

“An additional point in a game, a sporting competition, or any similar scheme in which points can be awarded.”

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Have you ever thought about the ways in which humans reap bonus points in our daily existence? Here are a few examples:

• Playing Yahtzee. If you roll a second Yahtzee in a game, and you scored your first Yahtzee in the Yahtzee box, you would score a further bonus 100 points in the Yahtzee box. (Got that?)
• Placing the letters s-q-u-e-e-z-e across a triple word score on the Scrabble board.
• The “point after” kick in football or the “nothing-but-net” foul points in basketball.
• Accumulation of airplane miles.
• Spending lots of money with a credit card (translates into those airplane miles).
• Spending lots of money so you can get a card punched (after 20 punches, which equates to $200, you get a $5.00 credit).
• Spending lots of money staying at a hotel.
• Knowing the answer to the Daily Double on Jeopardy.
• Writing a blog post that is so fabulous and note-worthy that a fellow blogger awards you many virtual bonus points that give you a puffy virtual chest on which to pin your shiny virtual medal.

In regard to the previous sentence, I give bonus points to bloggers for awesome posts. Just ask Dan. I recently gave him a good 50-year supply of bonus points for mentioning and giving respect to the Green Bay Packers in a post about football, beer and wings.  If Dan would have mentioned gray cats and orange bicycles in the same post, he might have broke the bank.

Maybe next time.

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Q: Who on earth came up with bonus points?

A: I don’t know.

Wikipedia does not have a “bonus points” page. Searches for “the history of bonus points” or “who created bonus points” only compiled a list of companies who offer rewards for being a good, spending customer. Wikipedia did have a page on loyalty marketing, but it didn’t say much and I’m not writing a post about the loyal Kohl’s shopper. I simply want to give you the bonus points you deserve. I want to be the waitress who gives you a free chocolate dessert because of your pleasant demeanor and for being patient while the chef re-cooks the medium-rare steak that was burned to a well done crisp. I want to be the pants pocket that releases the twenty-dollar bill you forgot about last winter. I want to be the boss that gives you the afternoon off for doing a fabulous job on an important project.

I want to give you the reward of bonus points.

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Why, yes! Yes, you do Dr. House! And so does everyone else.

Q: How do I win bonus points?

A: What do you mean? Weren’t you paying attention? I give them for awesome blog posts.

Q: How do I win bonus points NOW? Right here and NOW? 

A: Oh, you’re one of those…

For the instant gratification people, or simply to play along in good spirit, here’s how you win bonus points today, right here and right now. No waiting.

• COMMENT

That’s it. All you have to do is comment at the end of this post. Say anything you want. Funny, sad or stupid. Share your favorite quote or piece of trivia. Tell me about the weather or the new pair of shoes you bought on sale. Tell me how much you hate liver and waiting in line. Anything. All comments will receive bonus points based on absolutely no criteria, but subject to mood and/or level of giving spirit.

What? You thought there would be something more to earning bonus points?

Nope, I only want to reward your comments.

On the other hand, you could do a headstand or a cartwheel, I suppose. That’s worth 50 points.

Don’t hurt yourself.