SoCS: If He Could Talk

“Oh boy…” “What is it Gibbs?” “Why don’t you ever stay home?” “I am home, sitting here in my pajamas.” “I mean all day.” “Oh…” “It’s one of those two days when you don’t have to earn money for kibble.” “Yes it is.” “Then why don’t you stay home?” “Because I have other things to do.” “Like what?” “Like shopping for food, my own kibble if you will. Or shopping for clothes, having lunch with friends, going to church, ridingRead more

Musings from the Pod VII: It’s All I’ve Got

“Ugh…Gibbs.” “What?” “I’m disgusted.” “I told you there’s a reason why I don’t always cover the poo.” “This is not about you.” “Then what?” “Mom is filling up the big blue box with her clothes again.” “I know, I’m trying to ignore the situation or make her think I don’t care.” “That never works.” “It’s all I’ve got, dear Ziva.” “I wish mom would stay home.” “I thought about tripping her as she’s walking down the hall.” “What good wouldRead more

Christmas Eve from the Pod

Gibbs? Yeah, whattya want? Well aren’t we Mr. Grumpy Pants… I’m busy sleeping in my Christmas present. You mean OUR Christmas present, right? Mom bought the new cat tree for the both of us. Whatever… Gibbs! Why are you acting like the cigar you left in the litter box? I guess I’m a little down today. Why today? It’s Christmas Eve. Santa is going to leave something for us tonight, although he has big shoes to fill. Mom outdid himRead more

Musings from the Pod IV: Holy Mackerel!

“Hey Gibbs!” “Yes Ziva?” “I have been meaning to ask you something. What happened Friday night?” “What do you mean?” “I want to know what happened. I heard mom yelling at you. Loudly. I heard her say the “naughty” word and then mom chased you into the bedroom and shut the door.” “Yeah, so?” “What did you do?” “Why do I always have to do something?” “Mom yelled “naughty” at you, so that probably gives it away. You always seemRead more

The Green Room

Why must I be your prisoner, locked in the pistachio green room all day? I have given you perfect love and constant, faithful loyalty I speak your name every day, loud enough for the neighbors to hear, but you order me to shut up. I devour your daily tuna fare and brazenly beg for more. You are held in motherly high esteem, yet, here I am, locked in the square green room. The days can be hollow and lonely. IfRead more

Musings from the Pod II

In a continuation of the hardship story of two hapless felines who suffer the indignity of a too-hard bed, not enough love, and far too little food… Mom? Yes Gibbs. Stop it. I will if you get your gray butt over here and write this post for me. Just a minute, I’m almost done licking my… Gibbs!!! Hey Ziva! Are you awake? Just barely. The last bowl of kibble did me in. I think I could sleep all day. DoRead more

Gummy Bear Truth

Do you ever question your sanity? Do gummy bears or other gelatinous objects talk to you? Does a horned animal give you daily affirmations? Who tells you that you’re not the crazy one? Or are you crazy? While pondering the answers to these questions, please enjoy a musical interlude provided by one of me-me-me favorite Muppet characters. Happy, Joyful, Sane Wednesday! This post has been brought to you by a crazy little puppet with orange hair. It has also beenRead more

Musings from the Pod

Hey Gibbs, what do you think it’s like to be a dog? Gross. Really? That’s your answer? Yes. Dogs are gross and they live gross lives. Why do you say that? Because they sniff each others’ butts. Gibbs, you smell my butt. Way more than I like. That’s because your butt smells nice, unlike gross dog butt. My butt smells like poo and feline female. How is that not gross? And how do you know what a dog’s butt smellsRead more

I, Clawdius

“I, Felinius Clawdius Gibbserus Zero Bratticus, this-that-and-the-other (for I shall not trouble you yet with all my titles) who was once, and not so long ago either, known to my friends and relatives and associates as “Clawdius the Idiot” or “That Darn Clawdius” or “Clawdius the Howler” or “Claw-Claw-Clawdius” or at best as “Poor Uncle Clawdius”, am now about to share this strange history of my life; starting from my earliest kittenhood and continuing year by year until I reach the fatefulRead more

Cat Talk: Yes, it is!

  Ziva? Ziva? Are you napping? Ummmm…really? You’re kidding, right? Well, wake up. Mom wants us to write a post for her. She’s busy decompressing during her vacation and would rather sit on the couch, watch daytime TV and eat a cupcake. Oh. Are cupcakes good? I’ve heard they are good, but the humans never offer one. All I get is beef, chicken and smoked salmon. And an occasional cat treat. Ohhhhhh…I love the salmon. You can keep everything else,Read more

Dr. Gibbershteen

Dr. Gibbershteen: “Love is the only thing that can save this poor creature, and I am going to convince her that she is loved even at the cost of my own life. No matter what you hear in there, no matter how cruelly I beg you, no matter how terribly I may scream, do not open this door or you will undo everything I have worked for. Do you understand? Do not open this door.” Ziva: “Yes, Doctor.” Bug on the Wall:Read more

Bonus Points

n. “An additional point in a game, a sporting competition, or any similar scheme in which points can be awarded.” Have you ever thought about the ways in which humans reap bonus points in our daily existence? Here are a few examples: Playing Yahtzee. If you roll a second Yahtzee in a game, and you scored your first Yahtzee in the Yahtzee box, you would score a further bonus 100 points in the Yahtzee box. (Got that?) Placing the letters s-q-u-e-e-z-e across a tripleRead more