One-Liner Yoga

Reverse Warrior Pose. I do not look anything like this…I wear capri bottoms and my mat is black.

I’ve recently amped up the yoga practice.

Signing up for monthly unlimited classes has been an incentive that drags me to the studio two to three times a week. The studio is also running a summer challenge – complete 30 days of yoga in three months – with the opportunity to win a trip to Bali in the end. Who wouldn’t go for that?

Truth be told, I will have to work at getting in 30 classes. I’m only at 18 and will need to keep up a dedicated pace in the month of August to finish.

Anyhow, during a recent practice, teacher Lisa was on a roll, in a very special zone. This was a vinyasa (power) yoga class in a heated studio (around 90F, 32C). It was also hot outside, so we were all destined to sweat.

Lisa began with a warm-up, per usual, which involves positions called child’s pose, table top, cat/cow, thread the needle, and a few more. It’s a way to warm up the body and start breathing in through the nose, out through the nose.

Enough of that crap must have been Lisa’s inner cry as she began what would be 20-30 minutes of 90 miles per hour yoga.

Downward Dog! Plank! Chaturanga!

*snap, snap*

*sweat, sweat*

Chair Pose! Forward Fold! Rise to Mountain!

*snap, snap*

*sweat, sweat*

Warrior I! Reverse Warrior! Warrior II!

*snap, snap*

*sweat, sweat*

(Don’t forget to breathe!)

Triangle! Half Moon! Back to Warrior II!

*snap, snap*

*sweat, sweat*

By the time the series ended (there were a number of additional poses unnamed above), my towel was drenched, the mat was heavily dripped upon and I was thinking OMG!Β Lisa’s guidance and cadence are always great, but today she was on an urgent mission.

We finally…finally ended up on our backs, on the mat, waiting for the next thing to happen.

Lisa happened to walk past me and I asked,

“Did you have too much caffeine today?”

Lisa repeated my question, which was met with laughter by the other heavy sweaters in the room. I was not alone. They understood the fast and furious speed of instruction.

Yogi Lisa answered my question with a “no,” but I swear she was lying.

I made it through class, to the final resting pose of Savasana, without fainting or dying. As my reward, I stayed for the Yin practice, which is mat work in an unheated room, with an intent to stretch and breathe and be present. The front doors are opened and the cooler breezes sneak in during class.

It was a good way to calm down from Lisa’s snappy session and be entertained by the Pokemon Go event that kept walking past the front doors.

(I bet the Pokemon people were only sweating from figuring out their next move, or whatever it is they do.)


This post has been brought to you by caffeinated sweat and Linda Hill’s One-Liner Wednesday. If you are wondering what One-Liner Wednesday is all about, CLICK HERE.

Linda G. Hill is the Queen of One-Liners and rules over her kingdom of followers. Check out today’s post and commit yourself to join the Queen’s one-liner army because there’s no fighting or blood, only comradery and fun with words.

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30 responses to One-Liner Yoga

  1. Ally Bean says:

    Great line. I like yoga, am lax about my practice, but think that I need to get back to it. If only for the opportunity to hear funny lines muttered by my fellow yoga students.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Yeah or the funny sounds…like someone snoring during Savasana. I was out of practice for a long season between a bad foot and sore shoulder, but now I’m back to a practice from several years ago when I attended class three times a week without fail. It feels great, Ally.

  2. Dan Antion says:

    I got a little winded reading this, phew. I don’t know what those poses are, but they don’t sound like ways in which I would easily bend, Good luck getting to 30 and Bali. It would be pretty cool to be able to say “I yoga’d my way to Bali.”

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Yes, it would be very cool, but I’m not usually the person that wins things like this. It’s more of an incentive. You don’t have to bend into a pretzel to practice yoga. If that were the case, many people, including myself, would not go. It takes a regular practice and even then, some body parts just say “no way.”

  3. Joanne Sisco says:

    I loved your caption on the opening photo πŸ™‚ I’m pretty sure I look like that too while doing a Reverse Warrior! … well, except for the short hair and capri pants πŸ˜†

    I am also doing a 30-day online yoga challenge, but I’m well behind. Why I thought doing a 30-day challenge in July would be a good idea is beyond me. However I am glad to be back doing the familiar poses. I had been away much too long.

    Yesterday’s workout was similar to yours. It was paced a bit too fast for me and I eventually finished a sweaty, soggy mess, mentally begging for mercy.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      We are both yoga rock stars in capri pants!

      Welcome back to Downward Dog and heavy sweating, which is good for us. Burns off the toxins from the beer and bakery! 😏

  4. loisajay says:

    A yoga facility downtown had yoga with cats…..photos were a riot. Yoga? What yoga. Here kitty, kitty…..

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Ha! I know, Lois. I’d be petting or cuddling the cats. It’s also why it would be hard to go to goat yoga, especially if they are in pajamas.

      We’re getting a cat cafΓ© here in Appleton, to open this month. I’m so excited, I can hardly stand it.

  5. JoAnna says:

    I go to a “gentle” yoga class once a week at the senior center, so I’m impressed by your perseverance, sweating, and your question. Bali! Bali! Bali! Looking forward to seeing Bali photos from your trip. πŸ˜‰

    • bikerchick57 says:

      At some point, it will be gentle yoga for me as well, Joanna. Not sure how much longer my body can keep up with power yoga, but I never want to give it up. Bali!

  6. Laurie says:

    Whew! Sounds like quite a workout! I bet Savasana never felt so good. I used to go to hot yoga. At the end of class, during Savasana, the instructor would come around and place a chilled stone on your forehead. What bliss!

    • bikerchick57 says:

      The chilled stone must be a “thing” with yoga instructors – they do this at my studio too, but not all the time. One instructor fans everyone with a towel scented with orange essential oil during Savasana. That’s my favorite – love the smell and the breeze!

  7. marianallen says:

    You have my intense admiration for doing Yoga at all, much less that hard-core stuff. I *think* about doing Yoga. Kind of Zen workout, maybe?

  8. I’ve never really taken to yoga so here was my thought process:

    Urgh. Yoga. But it’s M-J so I’ll read it. Ha. Funny. Hm. Well, I do like a challenge. And a prize at the end. So yeah, I could probably go for that. Okaaaay. That’s bad. Worse. M-J, you’re not winning me over. Ah. That’s more like it. Oooh. Pokemon. Now you’re talking.

    So this was fun. But I’m still not sold on yoga.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      To each their own, H. I was never sold on running, so there’s that. I prefer to turn red in the face and breathe heavy on a yoga mat and sometimes on a bicycle. As for Pokemon, I have no clue. None. And I guess I prefer it that way.

      • I think that’s totally fair enough. Tbh, I’ve never played Pokemon Go but, you know, mother of three nerdy boys , so I know a thing or ten about nerd culture.

  9. joey says:

    FABULOUS one-liner! I feel that! I would never, ever, ever in a million years take hot yoga. No way, Jose. You go girl! πŸ˜€

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Going again this afternoon. I wasn’t sure about hot yoga when I first tried it over 10 years ago, but now I could not do without that heated room. It’s not the same otherwise. Then again, you don’t like heat so I can understand why it’s not appealing to you. You need iceberg yoga. :-p

  10. Way to go, Mary J! Yoga is not for whimps. I used to love yoga — now I can’t reach around my giant stomach… But maybe once I get rid of enough moving boxes, I can have room to try again. I didn’t have enough floor space in DC. Anyhow when I was young I liked to follow along with yoga master Richard Hittleman on TV and/or one of his books.
    Hugs.

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