“The words we use for ourselves and others have weight.”
So said one of the worship team members a couple of Sundays ago.
It’s a call for us to respect ourselves and others in what comes out of our mouth.
To not call ourselves, spouses, friends, or family bad names.
To grant peace to our neighbors and our negative thoughts.
To verbalize love and acceptance to self and the human community.
Overcoming religious, political, economic and ethnic differences when we speak is a tough one, especially in these times of social media and talking heads, when it seems all too easy to verbally attack others.
Overcoming the words we use to describe self can also be a challenge. I’ve told myself on more than one occasion, “Gee, that was stupid,” or “I’m such an idiot.” And then I feel bad for a day, two days, longer…
Our words really do have weight, whether thrown at ourselves or others. Words can either be used to raise one end of the scale in positive, respectful conversation, or they can be used to lower the other end down to the ground with negative, disrespectful discourse.
Why do we do the latter?
What good comes out of it?
Does it make us happy to bring down ourselves or the rest of humanity?
To the last question, I answer “No,” and yet we continue.
As the holiday season approaches, I ask that you be kind. Be kind to yourself and others. Find the good in who you are and the people in your lives. Tell the face in the mirror it is not stupid and let those in your life know how much you appreciate them. Smile at the homeless person on the corner and wish them a good day. Speak quietly and with an open mind when your friend’s opinions are not your own. Love your neighbor for the rest of this year and always.
Give words the kind of weight that makes for a better you, a better community and a better world.
This post has been brought to you by a scale and Linda Hill’s One-Liner Wednesday. If you are wondering what One-Liner Wednesday is all about, CLICK HERE.
Linda G. Hill is the Queen of One-Liners and rules over her kingdom of followers. Check out today’s post and commit yourself to join the Queen’s one-liner army because there’s no fighting or blood, only comradery and fun with words.
Mary J Melange 
This is so true, Mary. I accept your challenge. I don’t mean to be negative or disrespectful of anyone (or myself) but I do say things like this (more to me than others). Maybe paying attention to it for a few weeks will set a better pattern in place. Thanks. This is brilliant!
Thanks Dan. I’ve grown very tired of the name-calling on social media, TV, etc. and not being nice to myself on occasion. It’s a good time of year to put that aside and be thoughtful with the spoken and type-written words.
I just did this to myself, yesterday, over the most trivial thing.
Wonderful post, Mary. I think a lot of times we are kind to others, but unkind to ourselves. We should offer the same grace to ourselves that we offer to others. Thanks for the good reminder!
You’re welcome, Laurie. I was very unkind to myself a week and a half ago at work, while others were very forgiving. I’ve been trying to practice better self-grace ever since.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I’ve said ‘gee, that was stupid’ to myself. Being kind shouldn’t be so hard!
I know, right? We’re smart people, not stupid!
I agree. Gotta be nice to yourself first if you’re going to be able to spread kindness around. Why is that so difficult to accept?
In answer to your question, Ally, I can only speak for myself in that I tend to be a perfectionist. So, when I make a mistake, it’s bigger in my mind than it should be…and I end up calling myself dumb or stupid. I tend to be more forgiving of others because it’s less difficult than forgiving myself. Maybe it’s just a human psyche thing…
I used to be much more of a perfectionist than I am now. I understand your reasoning, but life has mellowed me so that I forgive myself much more easily now. Might need to write about that someday…
I think that’s a great idea for a post, Ally. Let me know when it comes to fruition.
Words for life, Mary. Great reminder to be kind, people!
Thanks Lois. You are awesome and kind!
Thanks for this, Mary J. While I try to always be “kinder than necessary” (as the saying goes) to everyone else, I admit that I’m the world’s worst about negative self talk. I literally call myself names — and I do it out loud. However, I work on it. I have ups and downs with it, but I work on it. Hugs on the wing!
A friend of mine once told me I should look at myself in the mirror every morning and tell myself how awesome I am. It’s a good idea, in a sense, but I tend to feel awkward and also afraid I might turn into some form of narcissist. My faith and upbringing taught me to be humble, but I guess that’s different from negative self-talk. Next time you want to say something bad to yourself out loud, Teagan, sing a happy tune instead because you are awesome. Purrs on the fur! 🙂
I’m right there with you. I just posted about JetBlue highlighting the good we do. We can start with words.
Thanks for sharing the JetBlue post and the good they are doing with both words and actions. It’s a positive force for employees and customers, something all businesses should be willing to try.
❤ in a world where we can be anything, be kind …. even to ourselves which for me is harder sometimes.
Being kind both ways makes for a much happier self and a lot less conflict with others.
True. One of the reasons I got off most social media is that the belittling and name calling and outright abuse in comment sections was distressing. We seem to have lost the ability to have a civil conversation about topics on which we may disagree. Unfortunately this trend seems to be flowing from the top.
For myself, I generally need to remember the reverse of the usual rule – treat yourself as you would treat others. 🙄😁
I am still on FB, but some days I find it difficult to scroll past the angry or hateful political posts. I don’t understand the point of these posts and lack of civility. If only they knew how much better life is with kind words and an open mind to discussion.
Your reverse rule is a good one to remember.
I try not to scroll on FB and just check on uplifting people and pages. Sometimes I forget this though.
I know, Joanna. I much prefer the positive and funny posts on FB. Give me a silly cat any day over politics.
Yep! We need those silly animals who are so good at helping us smile and live in the moment.
What a great reminder as we head into a pretty hectic season. Add in the heated political situation and we’re poised for a rocky couple of months. I’m committed to kind!
Thanks for your commitment to kind, Laura. We’ll need as much of that as possible in the next year.
Your words of kindness brightened my day! Thank you, Mary 🙂
You’re welcome, Shelley. Have a wonderful Friday!
Thank you – you too!! Stay warm!
The critical voice can be subtle. Sometimes it’s just a whisper in my head from years of habit. It takes intentional effort to override with positives. Thank you for the reminders and inspiration!
You’re welcome, Joanna. I have those whispers too, but happy they are only whispers and not loud shouting. It’s easier to tell hispers to shut up.
Exactly! I have read some things about giving them loving kindness, like a wounded child, etc. But sometimes “Shut Up!” gets the job done.
It is so unfortunate that this needs to be a homily and of course, worse that we must be reminded at the beginning of a season of what should be about generosity of spirit, charity, goodwill, light…
Good for you, spreading the kindness agenda 🙂
Thanks Joey. Every little piece of kindness helps! 🙂