
“A witch, a vampire and a jew meeting in secret. It would set Christian tongues wagging for miles.”
— Rabbi Loew in A Discovery of Witches
Rabbi Judah Loew ben Bezalel, who was also known as The Maharal and lived during the 16th century, was an important scholar, Jewish mystic and philosopher who served as a leading rabbi in Moravia and Bohemia (Czech Republic).
However, I am not here to provide a history lesson because the focus is on historical fiction and a farcical post.
I’ve watched A Discovery of Witches more than a few times (and read the associated books) and every time I watch this particular episode and hear Rabbi Loew’s comment, I feel a joke coming on.
A witch, a vampire and a jew walk into a bar…
I can’t help it. My mind likes to settle in weird places.
And then I wonder what type of adult refreshment the three would order upon being seated, after the other patrons stopped staring.
A bloody Mary for the vampire?
A glass of wine for the Rabbi?
A bubbly Halloween concoction for the witch?
I have no idea what the actual joke or punchline would be in this scenario, but it might be fun to hang out with the threesome and see what happens. What type of world problems they may solve. What kind of food they might order. Or if a few of the bar patrons who don’t understand acceptance and inclusion approach them with a heavy cross, a boiling cauldron of oil and an odiferous string of garlic.
What say you?
If you have a middle and end to this possible joke or further thoughts on the subject matter, feel free to leave them in the comments. Nonsense and fictional fun in a bar is always welcome! Right, Dan?

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It is hard to read that and not expect a joke coming around the bend. Maybe the bartender reaches for the witch’s broom to clean up a broken glass, maybe…my mind is wandering.
Have a good day and a good second half of this week, Mary. Mazal Tov.
And the vampire bares his teeth when the bartender tells him they don’t serve raw meat, but the wings and clam chowder are excellent.
Thanks Dan, same for you on the good day. Cheers! Have a brew!
Ooooh, now were getting close to a joke – clams aren’t kosher.
This is going to have my mind teasing me for the rest of the day! Hmmmmm . . .
Good luck Pam! I can only come up with images. The joke itself evades me. Perhaps it needs a poem?
I’m no good at making up jokes, no joke. I’ll leave it to the more articulate commenters to answer your question, but I admit you’ve got a great set up… 😄
Maybe I’ll come up with a joke one day, Ally…5 years from now at 3:00 am. Then I’ll go back to sleep and forget.
Ha!
I was waiting for the punchline on this one! A Bloody Mary for the vampire….sounds good.
Perhaps the internet will have a joke or two for this. I’ll do some research when I don’t have more important things to consider. 🙂
After the first few sips the conversation drifts into buffalo theory and they each tell their own version based on the drink they prefer.
I need to test the buffalo theory. My brain cells could use some help. 🥴
I’m not sure Mary but guessing it may involve crosses. 🤔
Oh, so this is a Catholic joke…
Or do I need to throw in a nun?
A vampire, a witch, and a Jew walk into a bar and the bartender says, “You must be here for the bat mitzvah.”
Good one, Marian! I think I shall make you my honorary joke teller at the bar. 🙂
Haha! My mind immediately looked for the punchline too, Mary J. The closest I have is “A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walked into a bar. The rabbit said to the bartender, ‘I think I’m a typo.”‘
I saw one episode of this show before it got taken off whatever free service (or maybe Netflix) I have. I liked it a lot, but I don’t need to add any more TV expenses… so I wait and hope for it to come to IMDb or Netflix. Hugs on the wing.
Great comedic minds think alike! I love the joke! It’s really a great show, Teagan. Their third and final season should be out either later this year or early 2022. Maybe it will be available on Netflix after that. I watched it by signing up for free trials or finding a deal for a month and then cancelling the service. I understand about the TV expenses. They can add up, but thankfully I still come under what I was paying Spectrum for a lot of channels I didn’t watch.