Nonsense at the Bar

“A witch, a vampire and a jew meeting in secret. It would set Christian tongues wagging for miles.”

— Rabbi Loew in A Discovery of Witches


Rabbi Judah Loew ben Bezalel, who was also known as The Maharal and lived during the 16th century, was an important scholar, Jewish mystic and philosopher who served as a leading rabbi in Moravia and Bohemia (Czech Republic).

However, I am not here to provide a history lesson because the focus is on historical fiction and a farcical post.

I’ve watched A Discovery of Witches more than a few times (and read the associated books) and every time I watch this particular episode and hear Rabbi Loew’s comment, I feel a joke coming on.

A witch, a vampire and a jew walk into a bar…

I can’t help it. My mind likes to settle in weird places.

And then I wonder what type of adult refreshment the three would order upon being seated, after the other patrons stopped staring.

A bloody Mary for the vampire?

A glass of wine for the Rabbi?

A bubbly Halloween concoction for the witch?

I have no idea what the actual joke or punchline would be in this scenario, but it might be fun to hang out with the threesome and see what happens. What type of world problems they may solve. What kind of food they might order. Or if a few of the bar patrons who don’t understand acceptance and inclusion approach them with a heavy cross, a boiling cauldron of oil and an odiferous string of garlic.

What say you?

If you have a middle and end to this possible joke or further thoughts on the subject matter, feel free to leave them in the comments. Nonsense and fictional fun in a bar is always welcome! Right, Dan?


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18 responses to Nonsense at the Bar

  1. Dan Antion says:

    It is hard to read that and not expect a joke coming around the bend. Maybe the bartender reaches for the witch’s broom to clean up a broken glass, maybe…my mind is wandering.

    Have a good day and a good second half of this week, Mary. Mazal Tov.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      And the vampire bares his teeth when the bartender tells him they don’t serve raw meat, but the wings and clam chowder are excellent.

      Thanks Dan, same for you on the good day. Cheers! Have a brew!

  2. Ally Bean says:

    I’m no good at making up jokes, no joke. I’ll leave it to the more articulate commenters to answer your question, but I admit you’ve got a great set up… 😄

  3. lois says:

    I was waiting for the punchline on this one! A Bloody Mary for the vampire….sounds good.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Perhaps the internet will have a joke or two for this. I’ll do some research when I don’t have more important things to consider. 🙂

  4. John Hric says:

    After the first few sips the conversation drifts into buffalo theory and they each tell their own version based on the drink they prefer.

  5. marianallen says:

    A vampire, a witch, and a Jew walk into a bar and the bartender says, “You must be here for the bat mitzvah.”

  6. Haha! My mind immediately looked for the punchline too, Mary J. The closest I have is “A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walked into a bar. The rabbit said to the bartender, ‘I think I’m a typo.”‘
    I saw one episode of this show before it got taken off whatever free service (or maybe Netflix) I have. I liked it a lot, but I don’t need to add any more TV expenses… so I wait and hope for it to come to IMDb or Netflix. Hugs on the wing.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Great comedic minds think alike! I love the joke! It’s really a great show, Teagan. Their third and final season should be out either later this year or early 2022. Maybe it will be available on Netflix after that. I watched it by signing up for free trials or finding a deal for a month and then cancelling the service. I understand about the TV expenses. They can add up, but thankfully I still come under what I was paying Spectrum for a lot of channels I didn’t watch.

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