One-Liner Wednesday: From Mom’s Lips

“You’re full of crap!”

I’m not a regular here at Linda G. Hill’s One-Liner Wednesday, but I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to share a very special comment from my mother.

Mom turns 97 this Saturday, August 6th.

It will be a birthday different from prior years because mom insists that she’s not that old. Her dementia has her living in the past, often as a younger adult who simply wants to “go home.”

This past Sunday, the conversation went loosely as follows…

“Guess what’s special about next Saturday?”

Mom shrugs her shoulders and responds, “I don’t know.”

“It’s your birthday. Do you know how old you’re going to be?”

Mom gives me a look that she’s waiting for me to tell her. “I don’t know. How old am I?”

“How old do you think you are?”

CRAPThe wheels turn, but there isn’t an immediate answer until, “Well, you always tell me I’m 96…”

“You’re full of crap!”

I couldn’t help it. The aides within hearing distance couldn’t help it. We busted out laughing. Evidently, I’m up to >here< in goo, even though my eyeballs are not that lovely shade of brown.

Nice one, mom.

I eventually contained myself. “Are you going to be 77 on Saturday? Does that sound right?”

Mom nodded in agreement. “I guess so.”

Okay, then. I guess my brother, his girlfriend and I will be singing to a 77 year old in three days. Unless she’s 58. Or 69. Or 82. Or who knows.

Happy Birthday, Mom!

Love, your crappy daughter.

Join in on the fun of One-Liner Wednesday. CLICK HERE to see what Linda has to say today and discover links to other posts in the comments.


28 responses to One-Liner Wednesday: From Mom’s Lips

  1. Dan Antion says:

    Well, it seems that she hasn’t lost her spirit. I guess, sometimes, you just have to laugh. You’re a good person…maybe not so full.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Yes, the spirit is still there, Dan, and sometimes I am full of it. But, I’ll try to keep that to a minimum this week 😉

  2. Judy L. Brekke says:

    Wishing your Mom a very Happy Birthday no matter how old she might be! You are a loving daughter – I do not know about “full of crap”.

  3. Happy ‘whatever’ birthday to your mom. Mine also had dementia for the last couple of years of her life. She made it to 90 though, and still kept her sense of humour. 🙂

  4. loisajay says:

    It’s just a number. Happy Birthday, Mom! Forever shall you be young. Your crappy daughter notwithstanding.

    • bikerchick57 says:

      You’re right, Lois. Just a number. I’ll let you know if she tells me I’m full of anything else on Saturday or any other day.

  5. LindaGHill says:

    Sounds like my mom, though she’s only a spry 86-year-old. 😛 So funny and so sad at the same time, isn’t it? Thanks so much for joining in, and for the laughter! 😀

    • bikerchick57 says:

      Yes, Linda, funny and sad. You’re welcome for the laugh and I hope both of our moms keep providing them to us. The alternative is not a good thing.

  6. joey says:

    Haha! Do let us know how old she thinks she is when the day comes 🙂

    I have a friend whose mother called her after the party and thanked her for bringing all those handsome men. She made more than a few flirty and bawdy comments about them. They were Her Grandsons. The important part was that she had a good time.

  7. I guess anyone who lives to 97 and has to deal with age related mental challenges can choose what age she wants to be, right? And, then you get to deduct from your age so you are younger also. Win win. 🙂 Applause to you also for visiting and helping her celebrate her birthday because many older people are forgotten. 🙂

    • bikerchick57 says:

      I think often that if I live that long, I’m going to do and say what I want and be whatever age I want. Mom has certainly earned those rights after all these years. I’m looking forward to spending Saturday with family. We’ve decided on a pizza party, so we’ll see what happens…if mom eats it or calls it crap! 😉

  8. LB says:

    Happy Birthday (one day late) to your mother!
    Did she enjoy the day?

  9. I’m sorry I missed this (but glad I came back to it). So good that it gave you a laugh. And really, it’s just a number. When it’s me, I’ll be insisting I’m 23 as I have been for many years in my head. 🙂

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