On February 13, 2015, I wrote a blog post titled Chocolate Chips: A Valentine Song. The chocolate chip song was a bit of a cheesy take on Journey’s Open Arms. It was a passable post, I suppose, but not the best writing I’ve ever done.
Thirteen months later, a small group of bloggers were challenged gently encouraged by Dan at No Facilities to rewrite a former post…an offering we had published in the past that screamed do-overs! or a story that beckoned to have a new plot twist.
I immediately scoured past posts and came up with the selection noted above. The next question was what to do with it. How can I make it, at the very least, marginally better? Well, not too long ago, I wrote a piece called A Blogger’s Soliloquy, in which I mashed up Act 3, Scene 1 of Hamlet. Since then, I’ve been inspired by Shakespeare and Data to write a sonnet in iambic pentameter, with the proper subject matter or, in this case, food for thought. I hope you enjoy this reformed song.
I have but one desire, tis plain and clear
Of a darkish substance that summons me
Its sweetness, its smoothness brings my tongue near
To taste what the Mokaya gave to me
I speak the name borne of the cocoa plant
The name for which millions adore and lust
Chocolate! chocolate! I daily rant
Give me your cake and chips and mousse, you must
For to be without chocolate is hell
No man, woman, child shall ever endure
A burn in the soul that Tums cannot quell
Chocolate is love to the senses sure
Forever I shall taste dark dulcitude
With its creamy, come-get-me attitude
Feel free to share your comments regarding the original piece vs. the rewrite.
Which one did you like better? Did I meet the mark of a sonnet? Are you craving dark chocolate?
(Check back later for links to the group’s rewrites as they are posted.)
Reckon the director would let me add this piece as part of my lines as Lady Egeus? That woman could use a dose of chocolate.
Should thou not ask? What would be better than to be on stage with a box of bon-bons?
Exactly.
Wait a minute. Isn’t Egeus a man? Are you using crochet beard again?
Oh, well picked up. No beard (sadly). Lord Egeus, Hermia’s father, has just been turned into Lady Egeus, Hermia’s mother, with appropriate word changes. Good male actors are so hard to find, we do (when we’re allowed) prefer to gender flip the role rather than use a bad male actor. The last Shakespeare play, both my roles were meant to be male. And in our last Agatha Christie play, we gender-flipped four roles. It’s just easier. 🙂
Well, that makes total sense. Why are the male actors hard to come by? Just not their “thing?” Or just that bad?
I don’t know. It’s always been that way. Not just for us, either. It’s a general trend across the board in amateur theatre (in my experience, at least). Weird, when you think about it, as they seem to dominate the “celebrity” end of it.
There’s more money in celebrity than community. I will have to ask my theater friends if the same is true around here.
I should post a photo of the Easter candy wrappers I am tossing out right now (all variations of Reeses). I think you held to the pattern for a sonnet (which I don’t think is easy to do). I like this better than the valentines entry, but I do like chocolate chip cookies. Nicely done Mary!
Do it. I want to see the carnage. As for the sonnet, it was a bit intimidating knowing I had to abide by so many rules. But once I started, it became fun. I may have to do this again, perhaps a more serious subject.
It looked pretty intimidating.
“A burn in the soul that Tums cannot quell”. Chocolate, I know thee well 🙂
Oh, far too well…
I LIKE IT. If this is the rewrite, I like it. *shoves another Cadbury mini egg into her mouth* It’s good.
Thanks Joey! One can never go wrong writing about or stuffing their face with chocolate.
Did I hear ‘Dark Chocolate’…??
You did! Excellent hearing, Herman 🙂
I believe this version is better. However, now I am feeling the pangs in my belly and I can’t find a chocolate at such late hour of the night. What am I going to do now? 🙂
Have some warm milk and dream dreams of chocolate drops. Then, in the morning, so on the hunt for your favorite chocolate delicacy. Buy. Enjoy.
The milkman delivers milk in the morning. All I have in my refrigerator right now is tomatoes, cabbage, spinach, lemons and coriander and ice cold water.
Throw some cold water on yourself and go back to bed :-p
Ha Ha Ha.